Satan in the Machine

here's proof that Pat Robertson's deepest fear is true.

Set up the following code (letters of the alphabet are coded to multiples of 6).
Then sum up the coded values for the letters in the word COMPUTER.

A         6        
B        12        
C        18        18
D        24        
E        30        30
F        36        
G        42        
H        48        
I        54        
J        60        
K        66        
L        72        
M        78        78
N        84        
O        90        90
P        96        96
Q       102       
R       108       108
S       114       
T       120       120
U       126       126
V       132       
W       138       
X       144       
Y       150       
Z       156       
----------------------
                  666 - The "number of the beast", Q.E.D.*

* Revelation 13:18 -- This calls for wisdom: let him who has understanding reckon the
number of the beast, for it is a human number, its number is six hundred and sixty-six.

But not to worry. Shifting the "N" toward the left turns the bad guy into the good guy:

S A T A N
S A T N A
S A N T A

Proof that Barney is Satan:

Given: Barney is a cute purple dinosaur.

Extract the Roman numerals:
(Recall that the Romans had no letter 'U', they used 'V' instead)

    CVTE PVRPLE DINOSAVR
    CV    V  L  DI    V

    Add them:
    105 + 5 + 50 + 501 + 5 = 666

Q.E.D.

1998 / 3 = 666

Okay, if you really want to know the meaning of 666 here's what the Oxford Companion to the Bible has to say:

The number was arrived at by presenting Nero's Greek name Kaisar Neron in Hebrew letters, which also function as numbers: qsr nrwn; q = 60, s = 100, r = 200, n = 50, w = 6, so qsr nrwn adds up to 666. (Some western manuscripts read "six hundred sixteen" ... likely that they simply dropped the final n: qsr nrw for Kaisar Nero, making 616.)